Are you stuffed inside a box?

I spent a good deal of my life stuffed inside a box.

There was no room to move around. I had to stay perfectly still. As you can imagine, it was stifling.

I built this box myself.

I built the walls with can’ts, shoulds, should nots, ought tos, not acceptables, don'ts, won'ts, good, bad, better, worse, and only allowed certain emotions in my box. Emotions like peace, love, joy, gratitude, generosity, fun, certainty, and engagement are a few that were allowed inside.

My intention was to present the perfect gift to you. A box that was well put together, wrapped, and tied nicely with a bow.

The problem was that I was left with all of this “other” stuff that didn't appear to fit in the box.

Stuff like anger, sadness, fear, fatigue, boredom, confusion, ignorance, hatred, disgust, desire, lust, jealousy, rejection, and pain.

I tried to ignore, push away, deny, resist, and cover up the "other" stuff, but it just became stronger and more forceful. The walls I built weren't strong enough to withstand the strength and force of these emotions.

They expressed themselves in the form of self-destructive behavior, passive aggressiveness, outbursts of rage, insecurity, manipulation, and control. They destroyed the beautiful box I made for you.

I was forced to start over.

I heard about a new way to build a box.

One that seemed counter-intuitive and went against everything I had been taught to believe.

I was skeptical.

But, I didn't have a better alternative. I decided to give it a shot.

This time, I built the box a different way.

I built the walls with compassion, kindness, forgiveness, acceptance, love, openness, sincerity, willingness, courage, bravery, and trust.

Slowly, I started adding the "other" things to the box. Surprisingly, I found that the box could hold them without any difficulty.

I learned that the “other” things were much less destructive and easier to manage when they were just allowed to be there in the box. They didn’t seem to bother anything. In fact, they actually complimented everything else nicely and provided for a lot more space.  

I was left with an even more beautiful box than I had originally created for you.  There is so much more depth, color, intricacy, detail, aliveness, and creativity in this box. The walls are structures of incredible strength and resiliency, built on a strong foundation of self trust.

Today, everything is allowed in my box.

It is so much more expansive in here. There is room for everything. I feel free to move around and stretch, free to dance and sing, free to be myself and embrace all of my experience.

There is joy and pain, there is love and fear, there is happiness and sadness, there is engagement and boredom, there is desire and satisfaction. It's all here, and it's all welcome.

How about you?

What does your box look like?

What is allowed in your box? How does it feel in there? Does it feel roomy and spacious, or claustrophobic and suffocating?

If it feels claustrophobic and suffocating, I would like to offer you an alternative solution to consider. It may not make sense to your rational and logical mind. It is only for those willing to think outside the box.

My suggestion is this, open the lid that you have locked down so tightly and let some light in. Allow some of the “other” things into your box. Relax. Breathe. Stop resisting. See if you can reinforce your walls with some extra love, acceptance, compassion and kindness.

You can handle it.

I believe in you.

Don’t take my word for it though. Try it out for yourself. What do you have to lose?

In Ultimate Support of You!

Katharine

P.S. If you feel like you need 1:1 support to reinforce your walls or help you open the lid to your box, reach out to me. Simply click here and grab a 45 minute Empowerment spot on my calendar. We'll take a look at your box and determine what's needed in order for you to present a beautiful gift to the world.